Dear Bee, did you know, you’re fun-sized?

It struck me as I was shopping the other day. I saw ‘fun-sized’ chocolate bars. Then ‘fun-sized’ bananas and apples. For the first time, as I was putting a package of this ‘fun-sized’ fruit in my trolley, I realised that it was just another word for ‘small’.

Why is something ‘fun-sized’ if it is small? Is it fun to be able to eat something in three bites or less? Is it fun to be able to hold more than one of those things in one hand? Is it fun to eat one and feel a bit cheated because one is really not enough?

Does this apply to other things besides food? Are tiny hairs poking out of your face ‘fun- sized’? Is it fun to sit on a primary school chair and feel like you’re falling off both sides?

The only thing that I will consider being truly fun-sized is a tiny kitten. Kittens are so cute in their smallness; with their oversized ears and eyes; their fluffy hair and high-pitched mew. Kittens play and fall about, scrambling up curtains and landing on heads. Kittens are definitely genuine balls of fun.

But, being a small human being, and I’m sure you will agree with me on this one, Bee, is really not that fun. Having to stand on the tippiest of tiptoes to reach the box of cereal that’s at the back of the top shelf is not fun, it’s embarrassing. Going to a gig and always (always) having the tallest person stand in front of me so I’m stretching and reaching in order to see any part of the show is not fun, it’s annoying. Trying on a pair of jeans that look amazing on the model and finding at least two inches of denim covering my feet is not fun, it’s frustrating. Having a tall person lean their arm on your head and use you as a prop is not fun, it’s unnecessary.

And wearing high heels just so you can be brought up to the same level as most other human beings is not fun, it is painful.

So what is it about being small that is fun?

Well, I’ve done a bit of research and, actually, being small has a few health benefits. For instance, we are less likely to develop cancer or blood clots. We are more likely to lead a peaceful life (who wants to pick a fight with the little person in the corner?), and we are less likely to suffer from heat exhaustion in hot climates.

So, wiener-sized for the win!

And the other thing to remember, Bee, is that you are the size you are because that’s how God made you. He gave you little feet for a reason – so you can still fit in children’s shoes when you grow up and save yourself a heap of cash! He gave you little legs for a reason – so one day you could stop using them as an excuse and prove to yourself that you can achieve sporting goals if you put your mind to it.

And maybe so that one day, you could look at yourself and see that you are truly fun-sized, not because you can be eaten in three bites or less, but because you are able to surprise others with the huge size of imagination, heart, passion and perseverance that a small person can bring to the world.

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